The judgemental truth of natural hair and considering a relaxer


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Tumbling around youtube last week I came across a video of a girl making a vlog about going back to relaxer. I thought it was one of those click bait videos screaming ” watch me, watch me, I need more views”. So I watched the whole video: the reasons and finally the painful moment that I don’t want to remember. She got to the hair salon and after a painful process she relaxes her hair.

I will get into her reason later, yes I will, I have to. But first let’s talk about the judgmental truth of natural hair.

What happened with the BE YOU DO YOU? Oh, I know, it is only right when it’s the YOU we all want to see. The bad comments on this girls video is ridiculous. Be you, do you, means you and me can be whatever we want with our lives and our hair. If she decides to have natural curly hair, she is being herself and whens she want to go back to relaxer, then what? to her, she is being herself.

Ciber hate..when you post a bad comment in somebody’s feed, wether you know them or not, you are not only making that person feel bad but you look bad. Get a life, don’t hide behind a computer to be that person that no-one wants to be around. If you don’t like what you see, move along and get a life. If you don’t have something good to say don’t say nothing at all.

Now to her reasons and why we have to analyze them. I am not analyzing wether she wants to wear her hair relaxed, curly, blonde, purple or grey….

Her reasons:

  1. My hair is not growing. Hair grows from the inside out, so despite if you have curly or relaxed hair, if your hair is not growing, you should pay attention to the inside. A healthy diet, water intake, blood circulation, diseases, vitamins, etc. are those responsible for your hair growth. If you want a relaxer, that is fine, but don’t think that because you apply the creamy crack on your hair it will grow any faster.
  2. My hair is falling. The chemical compound in hair relaxers continuously break the hair bonds. Eventually the hair will become very thin and will shed.. it will also eventually stop the hair growth and completely incinerate the edges.
  3. My hair will be more manageable? I can’t argue that, taking into consideration that everyone is different, I can however tell you that this isn’t true for me. I never had a problem with my relaxed hair, in fact, it was long, healthy, and strong. But the time to manage my hair was ridiculous, to have long, healthy relaxed hair, you need a lot of time and money.
  4. Repair Damaged hair? Listen, there are a lot of things to repair damaged hair, sadly they all require time and consistency. When you have a pimple or irritated skin, does makeup, perfume, and lotion make it better? no, right? but what happens if you apply a chemical? Think of damaged hair the same way. If you want to get a relaxer, a dye, a perm, or whaterver you want, first repair your hair and then do it.

That is all I have to say about that, mainly because I feel that the natural hair community has become very judgmental, I have experienced this first hand because I like to change and play with my hair a lot.
I focus on healthy hair, that is the primary goal of my journey, for that reason I believe that relaxer is not the answer, but at the same time I won’t be posting bad comments on nobody’s platform because they decided it was the best at the time.

I will however continue cutting, dying, straightening, and using all type of homemade goodness on my hair, because it is healthy, it is shiny, it grows like crazy, but mainly because it makes me feel happy. Do what makes you happy and don’t waste your precious time posting hate comments on other people’s platforms..

Here is her video, what do you think about it? Let me know in the comment down below.


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  1. Rosemary de la Rosa. says:

    She is happy. Probably she is. But when she said,” it’s just hair”. Sounds to me she lost her freedom. If she really wants to cream her hair, she won’t care about what people say, and she does.

    1. Daily Baez says:

      I think the same.

  2. Being honest, when she said “it’s just hair” looks like to me like she was trying to convince herself first about relaxing her hair, and after when she done it. Was like: ok, I did it right, nothing has happened, it’s just hair – inner crying-
    that’s was my personnel impression.

  3. partiendo del termino… “si a ella le hace feliz”, siento decir que no me ha gustado la verdad se veía mas guapa al natural, aunque no se que habría comentado hace unos meses atrás antes de comenzar en el mundo “pelo natural ” jejeje.

    Muy bonita tu pagina, aunque la traducción al español se haga graciosa a veces, saludos y felicidades

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